aLLie

Well... I suppose it's a bad day. Or ending that way. Sometimes I wonder why I have my moods. They don't seem to make sense. Then again, neither do I.

Today I sat at home. All day. Except for the hour and a half I went to work. There was a guy there shampooing the carperts, so I didn't have to vacuum the classrooms (thank goodness!!), so I got done a half an hour early. It felt good. But I got my laundry all done, my room somewhat more organized, and a few more episodes of Alias watched. I'll admit it, I'm addicted. I love them! Ok, I don't love them, I just really don't have anything else to do. School is frustrating, work is just... Cleaning. I think too much while I work. I need to have something to do so I can decompress. It's nice.

Life... I don't know where I am on that timeline. I think I'm stuck. Kind of like I'm stuck between junior and senior status at school. I think after this semester I will have finally broken through, but... that would be wishful thinking! I did apply for the nursing program at home, but I don't know if I've been accepted yet. I'm trying not to be too hopeful. What if I don't get in? Even with the attitude I have about it now, I don't know how I'm gonna do if I find that out. I'm trying to get it into my mind that I won't make it, but that's not having faith, even though I still haven't gotten an answer concerning that. What am I doing wrong??

This has just been a completely muddled blog. I can't talk to anyone... I don't feel that anyone knows enough, or even understands me anymore. And I'd better quit before I completely loose it. Good night everyone! Here's hoping tomorrow is completely wonderful!